Energy. Motivation. Inspiration. Excitement. Friends. A sense of belonging. My boyfriend close by. A change. A life.

I need all of the above. And if I had them, I would have something interesting to write about because whining does not count.

I mean honestly, who likes sitting around the house, bored and lonely out of their mind? Not me. I especially dislike the lonely part. It’s too normal now.

Once again, I feel like I’m just going through the motions of life. My life feels stagnant and honestly, so does my relationship with God.

It seems like I’m just sitting, watching time go by. And literally, that is what I am doing. But I don’t know how to change it and that depresses me even more.

I so badly want to live, like everyone else does. Now. Distracting myself with the past or the future doesn’t always get me by.

Loneliness might be the death of me.






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